To Ease Their Way


I began my volunteer career over 60 years ago, intent on easing the way of those whom I met on my life's path.  I'll go into a few particulars in a bit, but I begin with my world view.  And, even though the world has changed significantly over my lifetime, I invite you to consider a similar perspective.

I state proudly from the start that I have been a fool.  From my very beginning I was not motivated in ways most people are.

I spent my first twenty-two years steeped in white privilege and white ignorance.  Mine was a carefree childhood bubble-wrapped to protect me from many of the realities of the world (protected in a way that, in a just and humane world, all children would be protected).

My formal education had been dogmatically biblical, until I met some Jesuits who taught me a different, more critical way of thinking.

I was becoming a skeptic.  After 17 years, my schooling was over but my education was just beginning.

After graduation, despite my dad's efforts to discourage me, my volunteer career began when I chose to serve in the military at a time when much of the country and the world condemned anyone for doing so.

My personal animus against the war in Vietnam focused on the draft, a purely evil invention by old men to spend the lives of poor young men simply to make a profit.  (My personal opinion: anyone who wants to bring back the draft should burn in hell.)  Although I had a critical skills deferment from the military draft, I hated it so much I felt a moral obligation to do something to actively controvert the unfairness and injustice of sending innocent lower class kids to their deaths.

My three years in "the service" 1 were a study of human behavior in difficult circumstances, as I recount elsewhere on this website. 2

For me in my 20s, it was a time of great foolishness, and I look back on those years now as the beginning of the quest that has driven me ever since: to ease the way of those most in need.  For decades now, whenever I've been asked to do something foolish for someone—something costly that offers no tangible reward for me— the fool's mission in me has always been very clear: "Ease their way."

In 1988, having seen my daughters—your mothers 3—through high school and having completed my MBA, I looked beyond home and career for ways to be of use.  In that year when gangs and drive-by shootings were dominating the news in Portland, I helped initiate a pilot program seeking adult mentors for at-risk teens .  I committed to being a mentor for one year, stayed for seven, and ended up chairing the board of the organization.

Chairman wasn't where the action was for me, so in 1999 I ended my tenure in the mentoring organization and volunteered as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) in Multnomah County Circuit Court.   For 15 years I was an agent in court cases advocating for abused and neglected children, strongly influencing the outcome of cases for the better.

Being a CASA was remarkably effective work, but the reality was that as I gained experience—typically CASA tenure was 2-5 years, I stayed for 15—I was assigned tougher and tougher cases. In the end, as one of the most senior CASAs, I was appointed to two heart-breaker cases that offered no possible win for the children. Those two setbacks were so disturbing I decided to move on and volunteer at the other end of the age spectrum.

I began driving routes for Meals on Wheels in 2013, delivering meals to shut-ins and those in our community with serious disabilities or who are living in deep poverty.  In 2018 I volunteered for a special MoW program, Meals 4 Kids.   It's vitally important work and the Meals operation is remarkably complex and beneficial.  I'll be involved in it for as long as I am able.

In 2015 your grandmother and I became Long Term Care Ombudsmen (LTCO) for the State of Oregon.  We advocated for residents in a nursing home, a residential care facility right out of a Dickens novel, an assisted living facility, and two adult foster homes in the Portland area.  This again was important work on behalf of those with serious disabilities or who may have been abused or taken advantage of.

Back in the days when I mentored teens, one of my fellow mentors was Kathy Marchant.  Kathy had given up a successful management career to do public service (another foolish thing to do).  She subsequently became a student of Marshall Rosenberg and has taught Compassionate Communication since 1996.  In the course of her years of teaching she has improved the lives of many hundreds of Oregonians.  While I can't do what she does, I'm honored to assist her in developing and administering her programs.

In 2016 I began volunteering in the Oregon Department of Correction's Two Rivers Correctional Institution, a prison in Umatilla about three hours east of Portland.  Specifically, I worked with a group of twenty prisoners, some incarcerated for life, in a three-hour dialogue session on Saturday afternoons.  It's impossible for me to express how profoundly I've been influenced by the integrity and intelligence of these twenty men.

I'm currently on the board of the parent organization of this prison program, Open Hearts Open Minds.  OHOM sponsors volunteer activities within the Oregon prison system, including the production of remarkable performances by inmates of both classic and modern plays. 

As a correlated activity, I mentor inmates as they transition out of prison and into civilian life.  It is remarkable, to say the least, how much courage and humility it takes for an ex-felon to return to society with almost no means of support, and facing a world of prejudice.  Those who succeed have my deepest respect.

As I mentioned elsewhere, at the request of an inmate, I've begun a project to help all those in difficult circumstances find the support they need.  It began as a website, and has evolved into something much, much bigger: In Time of Need.

To sum up, as a volunteer I've served several distressed populations: drafted soldiers (indentured servants), at-risk teens, abused children, the elderly and home-bound, released prisoners, and the hungry.  And there's more I want to do, more people I want to serve.

There it is—my life as a fool.  As I reflect on it all, my proclivity to lend a hand has been profoundly satisfying, and continues even as I see my own sun setting.  I've found great comfort and fulfillment all along the way.

And so with love and joy I invite you to join me in foolishness to Ease Their Way.

1  There's no more important word in my vocabulary than 'service'.  The word comes from the Latin servus, meaning slave (serf).  However, my kind of service does not involve subordination to, or predominance over, those I'm serving.   Even in the military, that inclination wasn't an impediment.   No matter the circumstance, my endorphins kick in mightily whenever my service is peer-to-peer.
2  These are accounts of my experiences in the military:   Billy Hicks,   Lew Williams,   Charlie Lee,   "Now You Know",   Sergeant Oliver,   The Day I Left Vietnam.
3  I wrote this page, and all the pages in this website, for my grandchildren.  If it feels like I'm writing to you, welcome to the family.